Saturday, February 28, 2009

well usually

well usually sometimes i walk home with joe.
we live so close; half a block from one another.

tonight we went to this place and i spit on this fence.
what was fancy about that, you see, was the spiral.
my saliva hit a cross section in the fence weave.
yep, and then it flung around, and came back.
and it went around and around and around.
so by the end it looked like a barber pole.

pretty amazing as far as spit goes.

then later, joe and i found an imac.
it was one of those squarish roundish shaped ones.
so we carried it for a while, well joe wanted it, see.
but i was like, man, i dont know.
so i only carried the keybaord.
we found a tree that seemed perfect.
so we both got under the imac and pushed it up.
but right as it got to its future home in the tree.. was facing the wrong way, so the screen wouldnt face out.
i was pissed off about that, so i quit trying.
the imac fell to the ground loudly.
then it did the thing where it hissed.

joe said, im running, well actually he just ran and said nothing.
i walked and caught up and when we were together..
..he said, when snakes hiss at me, thats not good.
and i should control computers, i dont want them hissing.
that was pretty much the end.

but he showed me his parking garage.
he had an idaho license plate with an elk on it.
pretty sweet, im thinking.
but there were only like 6 bikes in his parking garage.
there are like at least 36 bikes in my parking garage.

oh, and its scott's birthday today, starting 2 hours ago.



Thursday, February 26, 2009

heres the fucking pizza

my pal filmer thinks i know how to make good snacks
well, hes wrong, im just a bachelor dude like any other
anyhow, i play it up like i know what im talking about
in this particular case, its how to perfectly cook
a frozen pizza

oh, and by the way.
i got this new camera, well
its stuck on some kind of colour tint
(note: canadian spelling of colour)
some kind of colour tint mode
well it fucking sucks, i think
that its stuck like that

Tuesday, February 24, 2009


i guess i caught this moment.
i probably couldnt play this again.
its a subconscious record of my thoughts last night.
i had been wanting to use this footage for so long.

heres the .wav if you want


this is emily, she is a girl i met the other day.
she was poorly portrayed in a prior post.
she is a beautiful, funny, smart girl!
we got along great right off the bat.
i think we have the same sense of humor.
i hope to hang out with her and my pal joe again soon.

Sunday, February 22, 2009


this video i am going to call one.
because of how many notes i play on the guitar.

this video i am going to call great whites.
because thats the name of it.

not skateboarding is a crime

i had to skate.

it was raining.

Saturday, February 21, 2009


I went to work a bit later.
good thing i did laundry last night while shotgunning beers.
i got up, i put on clean clothes and i brushed my teeth.
usually i ride my bike as fast as i can on my way to work.
i decided to ride slowly and look around.
i decided to sing while riding my bike.
now, i have a new mission.

so thursday night.
todd is moving to singapore.
he was djing at this place called lotus as his farewell.
on thursday night.
we showed up there, then other people did too.
i made sure to order two rounds of jack daniels shots for everyone.
we talked and drank and smoked and hung out.
kerry bought me a fish sandwich as we walked home at 2.30.
i got a spare bedsheet from the closet, and slept on the couch.
because i didnt put my laundry away after washing it - its on my bed.

at work today, i tried a few things with animation tagging.
i attempted infinite effect lifetimes with triggers.
particle emitters do not obey the loop settings.
karl invited me to the skate2 wrap party - it starts at eight.
we had a good meeting about mission flow and development.
i ate an untoasted english muffin with blueberry jam.
i was late to the meeting, but it was okay because it was optional.
i drank a V8 while i ate my blueberry english muffin.
i was feeling pretty exhausted and decided to leave at five.
i got home and got into my underwear and played guitar.

three hours later, i put my clothes back on and got on my bike.
it was called NU - a pretty fancy place right on the water.
i went inside and got in line for a drink.
i said hi to people i knew.
this was the skate2 wrap party.
somebody said, everybody knows andy klein!

i used my two drink tickets in a flash so i opened a tab.
first i sent three shots of wild turkey to a table.
i went to the table and had the drink with a pal and a girl.
we wanted more, so we got more shots.
somebody said, you know andy klein.. least by reputation?
and the other guy nodded.

the lines at the bar were incredibly long and painful.
if i had tits, i could probably have gotten a drink quicker.
i waited, and accidentally stole a bottle of wine.
because i was getting bored.

i had my beer (purchased) and wine (stolen).
with speedy confidence i reached over the bar to get wine glasses.
because the girl said that they aren't serving entire bottles of wine.
i poured glasses of wine for my pal (lets call him joe) and the girl.
here is a photo of joe:

i walked around, talked to more people, and had a good time.
i kept my bottle of wine in my back pocket, under my sweater.
i forgot to dress up, i was in a t-shirt and jeans.
other people were looking fancy.
the girl (lets call her joe's friend) liked the fact that i stole the wine.
here is a photograph of us:

we ordered more shots.
the pal (we are calling him joe) lost his wallet at some point.
joes friend, the girl, left.
my other pal was slouched in the bathroom stall.
so we got him some water.
i went to the bar with joe to inquire about his lost wallet.
the bar tenders were sloppy, slow, and took forever to talk to us.
this was nothing new.
they were keeping tabs by putting credit cards in glasses at the bar.
they would write down what you ordered on a slip of paper.
that paper was in the glass with your card.

they turned around and ignored us again.
i took my credit card from the glass.
i left.

i was riding my bike home along english bay.
i noticed a glow on the beach.
i passed it, immediately regretful.
i turned around, and rode my bike out to the group.
there was a campfire with maybe ten or twelve people around it.
i said okay guys bike patrols here.
they were partying, nobody said much.
i asked for a beer.
some guy said to get the fuck outta there.
a nice girl said, its okay, and got me a beer.
i gave her five dollars and she gave it to the jerk.
later i named the jerk Digger.

i had a drink, and enjoyed the warmth from the fire.
yet i was drinking a beer around a fire.. ..with ... .. friends.
new friends - the temporary kind.
the kind that i gave awesome names to..

they started to like me, for sure.
and i mean, i was liking what was happening, yeah.
i named one of them Red, cause he had a red sweat shirt.
then there was Philly, the guy with the flyers jersey and hat on.
i called this other guy Native.
Red was the most fucked up for sure.
Red had a lisp, or a speaking disability.
he was sounding disabled or, like, not hitting on all cylinders.
Digger was Digger because he kept digging in the sand.
he used his feet, and he used firewood.
and he used about anything, always digging.
he was the guy with the beer, i got another.

people were liking me alright.
there was this Filipino guy there.
we had an inside joke - the tabo.
it was really an awesome situation, and i was laughing.
i tried to borrow a cigarette from a guy, Becker.
he said i could have the second half.
Becker was drunk.
after smoking most of the cigarette he threw it in the fire.
i gave him shit about that.

two girls were dancing
Digger had a waist mounted speaker off his ipod.
it was a mix of hip hop, mostly.
a Bum showed up carrying bags of aluminum cans.
he asked for our empties, and said 'ill give you this in trade'
he put some marijuana in my hand.
we collected cans from the beach for him.
i rolled a joint
(but it took forever for Native to find his papers in his wallet)
he even had me dig through his wallet; quite trusting.
here is a photograph of Native's wallet:

we smoked and then the kids started beat boxing.
some were pretty good.
red was stomping on the pallet in the fire.
they said,
Andy's company is worth way more than beer and smokes.
but the Bum and i started talking about music.
cause he said he couldnt really relate to that beat box rapping.
i said, yeah its a different feeling, huh?

we talked about the animals.
we talked about the rolling stones.
we talked about yes.
we talked about the who and pete townshend.
we talked about psychedelics.
we talked about all kinds of things, and were having a good time.

the Bum started to tell me that he meets up with other 'intellectuals'
they are building a retaining wall during low tide, he told me.
today, he spent several hours moving boulders.
he said he did it to upset a lady friend.
he said, she would be mad at him tomorrow.
but he said, he did it for the sake of the fellas; they would laugh.
there is a clan of homeless intellectuals, is what the deal is.
they are building a retaining wall at low tide, i guess.

the fire was burning low and people were leaving.
i rode my bike home.
oh yeah, i smell like a campfire.
i love it.

Friday, February 20, 2009

believe in make believe

whats what is now.

i tell myself what i tell other people.
i can and i will and i do:

Kndrew Alein at 11:59am February 19
yeah man! tough it out! the only one who can make rob feel good is rob. happiness comes from inside.. ..if you choose nothing but depression and always want to tell everyone you are sad.. will be sad! dude, i go up and down each week, even in each day, but ultimately, i have to choose to be happy, because it feels the best, right?! but i can ... Read Moretotally empathize with feeling the range of human ... Read Moreemotion. its the name of the game, and i have definitely writen to the 'public forums' about my sorrows before... (just read andecline from July of 08) all im saying, is look at the bright side - you have a life that is more fulfilling and successful and generally happy than 90 percent of the rest of the worlds population - never take that for granted.

Thursday, February 12, 2009

interstate rocks

last time mikey and i went climbing was so long ago.
oh well, heres what it looked like back then.

last time mikey and i went climbing was so long ago.
oh well, heres what it looked like back then.

Monday, February 9, 2009

a rat caught a rat

hey dont do that guys.
come on..
they do squeak..
klein, break that shit up.
you better get in there...
my pet rats used to fight all the time.
{{squeak SQUEAK SQUEAK squeak}}
klein, break that shit up!
its killin him..
choke em out!
this is a little bit more brutal than usual.
yeah, its vicious!
its killin him..
the small one doesnt deserve to live!
hes gonna go eat him.
you think so?
that got.. ..thats a downer man...
a rat caught a rat.
COME ON, a RAT caught a Rat!
well, maybe one of 'ems..

Sunday, February 1, 2009


i think im getting drunk.
from eating this rotten fermenting banana.